I don't understand alot of aspects about humanity, and I'm sure they all have to do with the fact that I am naive and see the glass half full, and I am the most gullible individual you could possibly come across. (and maybe it has to do with the fact that I've never been in love).

I keep finding myself asking, why do 'people' (individuals who take up my life and the mass of teenagers i've shared time with) refer to others for what they do, especially if it's something perceived as 'glamourous' (artist, musician, actor, writer, anything along those lines, oh and the typical lawyer-esque kids too), I don't get it and I don't fucking understand that logic.

I think I'm numbed by society, or at least i'm unaware to it. I refer to people for who they are, not what they happen to do. "Yeah he's a great guy." not "Yeah he's THIS and does THIS", seriously? If the second is what you say... then the afterthought is who the person is. That's fucked up.

I don't know, maybe sometimes it's pride that the person you're talking about is able to live their passions out, but I don't think thats the case most times. I should just stop being so skeptical about people and their actions I'm sure, but it gets to me.

and on a semi-related note.
stop being so pressed on musicians just because they play music, it's tacky and I feel bad that they don't get that you're just out to fulfill some fantasy of yours. It's nauseating.

so get this.

all anyone ever wants in this world is so easy to define; love and acceptance.
fuck wealth and success, those are vices only perpetuated by the culture in which we find ourselves drowning in.
(ie. the french ideal of working to live, not living for ones work regardless of its supposed appeal.)

all you need and all you want is love and acceptance.
i'm convinced that if sat down and really tried to think of anything else you needed, it would be something physical. yes we all need basic human necessities, but those feed into the physical aspects of life. i'm arguing for what counts, the inside of our hearts and souls and what they yearn for most.

every kid i see that tries to label themselves to fit in, it breaks my heart. thats why the label that's been thrown at me lately is a fucking plague. I'll joke about it sure, but who wants to be told what they "are" at the core of their being. I cannot be defined by the music I listen to, the boys I lust after, or by the way I spend my time, and most notably by the way I clothe myself. you label yourself to make it easier to find acceptance among your peers.

well what about those who throw themselves out of society, who think they've got it all figured out?.
those are the ones that need acceptance most. i can't tell you the number of times i've felt awful for making someone feel un-accepted or hated. it rips me up inside. and no. i'm not saying that to win miss america. I'm saying it because I'd rather come clean now instead of later. (i'd suggest you do the same).

and love? I'd kill to have someone that loved me because i'm tired of it being one sided. If you love me, or want to, let a girl know. If you want physical lust related things, turn off that brain and mature. Honestly, love is all anyone needs. Id kill to know someone has me and loves me and all of that romantic goodness. I hate when people take relationships for granted. I hate it, i hate when you all complain about the disasters you're in. You have someone, and you do love them if you didn't.... you'd have given up a long time ago.

because believe me. rejection never stops love.
it changes it. but it'll always be there, dormant or otherwise.

and i don't mean just romantic love. its proven you live longer if you have a community around you that loves and supports you through it all, especially if you age. those that live alone die alone and quickly. because they have nothing to live for but work, and the physical "joys" of this world.

this is public because. well i want it to be.
read it and say something. tell me how wrong i am about everything.
or tell me i'm a genius, either works.